Asked: Hi! What would you do if you were always called ugly and not pretty nearly all the time? I used to brush it off but now it's really getting to me. In school at the breaks we get I always run in to the bathroom to top up my makeup because I am so self conscious! It's just destroying me. I care way to much about what people think and I want to stop? :( x Thank you and I hope you can answer this and I hope it helps others too.
Response: Sorry it’s taken me a while to get back to you. This one is really close to me as I am the target of online bullying too. Believe it or not a lot of girls are !. what that means is there are a lot of girls (and possibly boys) out there who feel a bit better about themselves and feel more powerful when they can make someone feel bad about themselves. A lot of it is done anonymously, but a lot isn’t. Simple things you could try is not use any social media for a while: OR have some rules for your site like me which is I don’t have ugly words on my site - so if you get some ugly words sent to you, delete the comment. Don’t take it personally, look at it objectively it’s just ugly words that have come out of someone else’s mouth or mind - NOT yours ! Think of it like maybe mucus (aka snot or boogas) that comes out of someone’s nose - they have a cold or virus, not you , it is their problem that they need to do something about, not you. So if someone says or writes something it is a reflection of their personality, not yours, their words are ugly, not you. So if you look at it logically, wiping your own nose when someone else has snot everywhere doesn’t do anything does it ? so thinking that you putting on make-up will cover up THEIR ugly words and personality is a little silly and pointless, isn’t it ? You can also try responding with “niceness” which will often confuse a bully - so smile, say “hello, how are you?” first, or wish them a good day. Most importantly, don’t take it personally - repeat to yourself it is their ugliness and problem not yours. Don’t give them the power to ruin your day !!
Love and light,
Sjana x